Traveling with Hearing Loss: A Journey of Self-Advocacy and Understanding
The Power of Assumptions
Like many people with hearing loss, I initially thought that simply sharing resources and tips with my friends would automatically translate into perfect understanding and accommodation. During our recent trip to Mexico, I was reminded that advocacy is an ongoing journey, not a one-time conversation. Truth be told, it’d been a while since we all hung out in a group setting together.
Author in a fuscia pink dress, blowing in the wind, standing on top of a boulder rock, posing against the background of the ocean and blue skies.
When Good Intentions Meet Reality
Despite sharing detailed hearing loss tips before our vacation, I found myself struggling in various situations. My friends, though well-meaning, would sometimes forget and continue conversations while walking ahead of me or speak without facing me. I realized that I had made the common mistake of assuming that one preliminary conversation would be sufficient.
“It's not just about sharing information once - it's about creating an ongoing dialogue about needs and challenges as they arise.”
The Delicate Dance of Advocacy
One particularly memorable moment occurred during a conversation with the hotel clerk. My friend, seeing me struggle to hear the guide's instructions, immediately jumped in to advocate on my behalf. While her intentions were pure, I felt a mix of gratitude and discomfort - I hadn't been asked if I wanted or needed that intervention.
“Sometimes the most well-intentioned help can inadvertently strip away our control if not approached collaboratively.”
Finding the Balance
Through these experiences, I've learned that successful navigation of hearing loss in friendships requires a delicate balance of:
Self-advocacy without apology
Gratitude for support while maintaining autonomy
Understanding friends' learning curves while setting clear boundaries
Accepting help while fostering independence
The Heart of Understanding
What makes this journey bearable - even beautiful - is having friends who are willing to learn and grow alongside me. Their commitment to understanding, even when they make mistakes, means everything. Equally important is my own understanding that I need to:
Speak up when something isn't working
Acknowledge and appreciate their efforts to accommodate
Share feedback constructively and with patience
Remember that we're all learning together
Practical Guidelines for Better Understanding
For Those with Hearing Loss:
Don't assume sharing information once is enough - gentle reminders are often necessary
Create clear boundaries around when and how you want others to advocate for you
Express appreciation for efforts while maintaining your right to guide your own experience
Be patient with yourself and others as you navigate these waters
For Friends and Allies:
Ask before advocating - "Would you like me to help explain your needs in this situation?"
Remember that hearing needs can change based on environment and energy levels
Stay open to feedback and view it as an opportunity for growth
Understand that your friend's needs may evolve and require ongoing adaptation
The Journey Forward
Through this experience, I've learned that true friendship isn't about perfect understanding from the start - it's about the willingness to grow, learn, and adapt together. It's about creating spaces where both challenges and triumphs can be shared openly, where mistakes are viewed as opportunities for growth, and where everyone's dignity and autonomy are respected.
Remember: The goal isn't perfection - it's progress, understanding, and maintaining connections despite challenges.
As I continue my journey with hearing loss, I'm grateful for friends who are willing to walk this path with me, learning and adjusting as we go. Together, we're creating a template for what inclusive friendship can look like, one conversation at a time.
Blessings,
Coach V.
